Menopausal mom to 2 young adult sons (one with ASD, ADHD, tic/seizure disorders and the other with attitude).

Wednesday, 7 November 2012

"Who's on First in Riley World"
Episode 4: Shotty Shotgun

It has been quite a while since I have posted about Riley World and even longer since an episode of “Who’s on First in Riley World”. Did you just gasp with anticipation? I am pretty sure I heard something. OK. Twist my arm. Readers…wait no more.

This past Sunday J2 was quick to remind us (more than once) that it was his one year anniversary of becoming a full-time permanent employee. He has been working part-time for 3-4 years but a requirement (from us) of not going back to school this year was a full-time job.

Since I had not made it to the grocery store I thought a celebratory dinner was in order.  :)  Three out of the four of us were on board. I was more than happy to not cook; J2 loves to eat out and he even went with G’s restaurant suggestion; which leaves well…surprise, surprise.

Now lately R has taken to sitting in the front seat and will race out the door to get to the car first.  As we are getting ready to leave J2 decides to “shotty shotgun” since the occasion was, after all, all about him. Oish. Have you ever heard a 19 year old whine? It is not pretty. Not one bit. I will spare you the back and forth.

This meant having to work out the details with Riley before leaving the house. If you are joining us for the first time Riley has significant cognitive issues so the following is pretty typical of our conversations:

Me:       Riley, J2 wants to sit in the front seat.
R:         NO!  (Well that was very clear. No misunderstanding there.)
Me:       Do you want to sit in the front seat on the way to the restaurant or on the way home?
(I know…too many words. Blah, Blah, Blah. That is why I emphasized just a few key words.)
R:         J2 can sit in the back. (Slightly annoyed)
Me:       You can sit in the front seat now or on the way home?
R:         On the way home. (Remember R tends to repeat the last option when under duress.)

(Just to confirm we are all on the same page I repeat back as a statement, not a question.)
Me:       J2 will sit in the front seat now;  you can sit in the front seat on the way home.
R:         NO! I want to sit in the front seat NOW.  (See how clearly he understood the first time?!?)

(We were going in circles so on to Tactic 2: Giving a choice with one clearly undesirable option (yes you read that right) and one somewhat "acceptable" option. It works for us. Please don't judge. FYI...Tactic 2 worked extremely well with J2 when he was little too.)
Me:       OK. Do you want to sit in the back two times or one time?
R:         Thinking…thinking…finally grumbling… One time.
Me:       Going to the restaurant or coming home?
R:         Coming home. we went. What we have found to be quite effective over the years was if Riley was given the choice (albeit slightly sabotaged) and he made the decision, he was ever-so-slightly more willing to accept the ummm "inconvenience"Of course there was the usual muttering from R about having to “share” and being “grumpy”. 

I have a few more stories I could share with you. Not to worry...this post has gone on way too long. Maybe tomorrow. If you just can't possibly are "Who's on First in Riley World" Episode 1, Episode 2 and Episode 3 for you to reread. You're welcome.

Until next time, D

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